Fidelity is motivated by love instead of obligation.
Everyone will develop insecurity from childhood.The sooner they learn to accept that humanity is not a one man show (with the exception of prophets and the US president) their focus will be on taming existing internal conflict created by fear.
We are afraid of almost everything in life. When was the last time you ask that cute girl in the bar what lingerie she’s wearing cos you’re a collector. Well okay not to such extreme but fact is when did you last let natural instinct set rules to your game?
Let’s start with sex and commitment. Or we can just talk about that only.
What is the difference between someone who sleeps around using protection as to someone who has dated more than a few and have sex with each partner without protection?
Well the former treats the fear of STD’s through scientific measures whereas the later believes her moral conviction of a monogamous relationship suffice as protection.
Whose belief is flawed? The hell with that because if one’s potency of belief will help achieve contentment, then by all means do it sparingly. But the person you have to be fair and truthful first is yourself. Once you have achieve this, any decision made is not a decision of knee jerk reaction to fear but of personal moral standing.
Man is inquisitive by nature. When in doubt you must learn to make well informed decision. Use Google or Bing for god sake.
Fear is the product of not knowing. Most of the harm brought to humanity is attributed to ignorance. As to the situation posed above, the looming problems go beyond moral standing. It is the practical problems that hide behind brevity of orgasm. It only takes a shot to wound a woman for 9 months and change your life forever.
So if you ask me if premarital sex morally safe? I would say, what is your exact fear? Diagnose your problem and find the solution. But are friends with benefit safer than prostitutes? Well, it contains the fear to an extent.
What is the fear of someone in a relationship then? The list is exhaustive but the focus would be fear of committing infidelity. How do you solve this? Keep on working on that love mojo. Your concern will then be on a fading emotion rather than a classic case of wounded ego.
Test your partner’s love in an unconventional way. Fart around them. (not to be abused). The idea is to judge consequent reaction for you to be able to answer the pertinent question on what motivates fidelity- Is she/he worthy of your heart? Find the answer and work around it for the rest of your life together should you decide yes, and god willingly you will have a blessed marriage/commitment.
When in fear always ask yourself why.